Friday, August 2, 2013

July 31-Aug 3, 2013 Rock Creek Montana Testicle Festival

We had seen the sign for this festival a couple years ago when we drove through. This year we happened to arrive the weekend of the Festival. Little local color, that is what traveling is about, so we went.

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The poster for the festival. The festival from the road. We were going to camp here, but decided since it is a huge party-warm up for Sturgis they say that it might not be the best place for the bus. So we camped the  down the road at an actual RV park.

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The first couple nights there was not much but a bunch of drunken bikers and a couple reasonable bands. The vendors were more interesting. This nut trailer wouldn’t seem so out of place at any other festival, but here is fit right in.

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We have been to lots of festivals during our travels. Usually they all have the same vendors. Jewelry, funnel cakes, beer, T shirts, crafts. This one was totally different. Tattoos, lingerie, leather and Crazy stitches for crazy bitches.  One booth had these western roses. Stems of barb wire and petals cut from beer cans.

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We had the signature dish. Rocky Mountain oysters. For those of you who don’t know what they are, they are bull testicles. These were sliced, breaded and fried. Tasted like most greasy bar food.

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A couple of T shirts for sale. The crowd. Mostly bikers and oddly dressed people. We stuck out like really straight people taking photos!

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The biggest Balls contest was hilarious. They took women judges from the audience. They had to judge the contestants on size, appearance, feel and smell. Only one of the woman would do the smell. The rest were pretty grossed out. Everyone was laughing, it was more of a comedy than a contest. You really could not see anything, it was so crowded, I had to hold the camera way up to get these photos. The woman in the pink hat is judging one of the contestants. The winner (censored for your modesty) had right before in the Shot glass roulette won a tiara and blinky ring he had to wear all night, so the guy with the biggest balls was tiara man.

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Nice light on the vendors. The bouncers were these burly guys wearing florescent pink T shirts that said ‘Tough enough to wear pink’.

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The official testy festy truck. One of the T-shirt for sale.

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The shot waitress were very attractive. There were others who were not so attractive. I censored Mike the naked guy, his leather and fur did not cover anything.

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Few more.

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The Rocky mountain oysters (bull testicles) for the ball eating contest and  the contest. They got 4 minutes to eat as many oysters as they could. Heaving disqualified you. The guy in the camo shorts on the end won. He ate almost 3 plates worth and he looked a little green afterwards.

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John was excited, they gave away the left over oysters. A biker wedding  at the festival. They arrived on motorcycles.  Krissy and Skidmark tied the knot and at  the end of the ceremony they mooned the crowd.

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Judging the best bike contest. Lots of nice bikes. The best of all was the Undie 500. It was a relay on  tricycles. Instead of passing the baton they had to chug a beer. They were required to wear underwear so they wouldn’t make the seats gross. This young woman left the men in the dust. It took her longer to drink the beer, but her legs were the only ones short enough to fit under the handlebars and she rode the fastest.

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The other two bikes also had the handlebars loose so they were hard to steer.  A couple of the guys fell off the bikes.2013-08-03 055

The winner.

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